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THE BALANCING ACT
I am talking about working women They may be professionals or working 9am to 5 pm desk job
No matter what they they have to juggle a lot to have the days chores done
Those who can afford may keep a home help -but remember here too you have to supervise so that your home & family chores run smoothly
I would like to emphasize on the women who have no or little help & how they have to run the 24hours in a day & make it work as there are 48 hours in a day! I belong to the latter class being a professional medic Our day is a 24hour day as we get emergency calls anytime in the day So when we plan our day we have to keep this in mind Some days including week ends.when there no calls we can afford to relax a bit but it is always like sitting on a volcano-never knowing when it will erupt!& always no matter what be prepared to run.
The day starts early in the morning by getting up before anyone from the family gets up do the breakfast .cook lunch I cut corners by serving the same lunch for dinner too.many a times to the disgruntle look from my husband & kids. The only thing I accepted was cooking ''maggie noodles '' in 2 minutes which did not take much effort & time if the kids did not want to repeat the same food for lunch & dinner Being a Indian our food -anything needed time & preparation before bringing it to the dinning table!
Waking up the kids & getting them ready for school was another 'fighting chore' with them as getting up in the morning was not a easy task with them -I suppose with all the kids it is the same routine. At this time in the morning here I was. with the hands of the clock ticking away merrily & making me anxious ,angry & stressed out-Oh ever so early in the morning'-Making me wonder how the rest of the day would go?
well with the morning chores done lunch boxes packed the kids & me ready we rushed to the car as i had to drop them in the school & make sure I reach my work place -the hospital on time to tackle the problems there The Morning rounds had to be done patients & the relatives had ever so many questions to be answered& pacified while the clock was ticking like my heart beats as i had to rush to the operation theater for the planned surgery for the day Be Calm -I had to say to myself & with the years of practice behind me I realised that i was calm &could think calmly It was not like this before when i started my practice in the early years of my training & learning But thank God it is rightly said practice makes one perfect! But i will not be honest if i say that every day was the same Many times there was cases which I knew could be complicated so before even starting the surgery I had to look back on my training to find any similarities which i may encounter & then be ready with a line of attack to what ever i find Or sometimes u encounter something which you have never seen before.In such a case the whole text book would run in the mind or even taking help from the experienced nurses helping me or even the anesthetic at the head of the table who all the time keeps peeping at what is going on . Many a times they are very helpful as somewhere sometime that may have a somewhat similar situation & remember what was done. . This many a times have helped in doing the right thing . After all in the end we should have a patient coping well & have finally going home after full recovery
Doctoring to me has been a very satisfying experience as I know I have always done my best -Never the 2nd best ever
the gratefulness from the patients & their families have many a times brought tears of joy to my eyes May of then say '' Doctor you have been GOD to me '' to which I say to myself & them That it is GOD himself who helps me to do what i can ,without HIM nothing is possible in life HE will always will be the essence of everything
I am so satisfied with my profession that i tell all & myself that if I have 9 lives like a cat or 7 Janma's then i would always pray to GOD to bring me back with a stethoscope around my neck I would not ask for anything else.
My lunch usually had no specific time -It had to be when I finished my work while others had it on time
My cooked lunch was always kept in the warm oven so that it was hot enough always when consumed
Well after my work has been over & I am back home it is time for tea My one child wants Bournvita the other chocolate & my husband & others in the family wants Tea & of course some snack I usually do a quick snack like Pakoda/bhajji, Upama or mostly is was the same left over from breakfast which i usually made more than needed as then this could save time & many a times I had to return late from work also did not get enough time to prepare some new dish.
By now it was evening & the children who had gone out for play come back Another round of saying have your evening bath & wear the night clothes
Home work to be done Dinner to be warmed & consumed ,clearing the table ,putting away things completing the washing & what ever needed to be done
Dinner time was also TV watching time after the TV era came to our homes'
the last work for the night was cutting the vegetables for the next day keeping & planning the next days menu & preparing for it
At last then it was the news paper reading time & any books novels to be read may be 2 hrs to myself [sometimes less] then it was finally bed time & sweet sleep but anytime prepared for emergency calls.
on many occasions these free time to myself I had to utilize for other work too like tailoring/ dress making for my kids preparing snacks for the birthdays I could not do all at the same time so it used to be one snack per day the preparation was started about a week before any event or festival Baking the cake/cakes icing it up, decoration of the house -this on the day of the event Invitations to be sent /given --usually it was verbal to the friends of the kids
well all these events went smoothly & to every one's satisfaction
Now you may ask what about your husband did he not help you -sadly the answer is a BIG NO he was a typical Indian male brought up with concept that he had to be served & catered to at all times I did trey to change him but this always ended up with sour times So I just gave up It was easier to do things myself than sulk/feel,bad about anything To be honest it took me some years to come to such a conclusion I learnt that it is easier to flow with the tide than go against it on many occasions than go & bang my head against a rock knowingly & get hurt
Now about home helps Most of the time I had someone who came & swept & mopped the floor & cleaned the vessels & also washed the clothes But many a time i was without one & had to do all the work that she did too Now I Thank God for washing machines ,dish washers vacuum cleaners today the home help is not needed or I do not miss them as with all these gadgets I can afford to do all the work once in couple of days if i am busy to do it on a daily basis
I am not hurt or sad at at the way I have worked but feel like giving a pat on my back for all the juggling I have done Whether my family appreciates it or not I do not care anymore as I know I have done my very best & to the best of my ability I am a happy & satisfied soul at the end of the day This is what matters most -Being at peace with myself
I know may who are not & trying to find excuses for it I feel sorry for it& them
At the end I feel Discipline is very necessary & time management & honestly doing ones best if one have all these ingredients then life moves on smoothly And above all do not have/feel self sympathy & keep thinking if it was any other way & keep comparing oneself with any other. Who knows this very person may be jealous of you!!!. & all that you have done & achieved
So ,be happy with what you have achieved & do not compare yourself with any other person
honesty is the best policy -so be honest with yourself for you achievements- faults/ errors /mistakes committed
Try to undo them if you can but never have self pity cut you up & bundle you up into knots for posterity
Be happy the way you are & thank GOD for everything
I have become a Doc OBGYN -a wish that took root in me when i was just five years oldt & had a very remarkable self satisfying Career & now retired
I have seen my children grow up in to good human beings & live their own lives I have seen the grand children grow up I have My own liitle house to call my own -my Hevan & lots of peace .